cool stuff about my mom

I have really good parents. When I went to work in schools I learned what a privilege that is -- to have parents who are really good at being parents -- parents who weren't throwing their unresolved garbage all over their kids -- parents who genuinely and entirely cared whether or not they were raising good, smart, responsible people. My parents didn't care if I was popular. They just wanted me to be happy with myself and to make smart decisions. They didn't necessarily even care if my decisions were exactly the ones they would have made (This is a recent realization. As I look back, I don't see any time when my parents were trying to just mold me into another version of them.) When I was a kid, I thought of them as these two people who were all up in my grill. Always asking me who and what and where and how and when and ... oddly... how many.

(I hated the "how many" question. My parents were obsessed with knowing how many people were in attendance at any given event. And they still are. "My flight was delayed because the plane caught on fire, a tornado ripped away the airport, and a giant lizard ate the grounds crew." "How many people were there?" I'm pretty sure this is the root of my compulsion to count things.)

Today is Mom Day, and my mom has an orchestra concert. We'll go and watch her play her cello, and it will be nice, but we'll all note the difficulty of listening to 1.5 hours of music that has no lyrics, and we'll eat cookies with strangers in the reception hall. Then we'll go back to my parents and let Mom cook for us (We are very generous children.). My sisters both have kids, so they can get away with it. But I don't have any, so it seems like maybe I should be doing a little more. I feel like I should vacuum their houses and bake them little festive cakes or something.

One thing about my mom that's really cool is that she doesn't know she's really cool (Possibly because my sisters and I spent most of our teenage years telling her how UNcool she is. For shame. We were so stupid.). I don't mean cool like she uses hip slang and wears funky hats and listens to obscure music. I mean, she just kind of does her thing and doesn't really care if it's popular. Not as a measure of defiance or rebellion. As I see it, my mom has quietly lived her life according to 3 principles:

1. Work hard (out of principle, not for gain).

2. Be honest (because it simplifies things).

3. Do what's right (even if it isn't in your favor).

What I've also learned from my mom is that these 3 principles are very flexible. They are true for Republicans and Democrats and Anarchists and Baptists and Buddhists and Atheists and Vegetarians and Meat Eaters and CEOs and garbage collectors. I think a lot of people, no matter their persuasions, would be much cooler if they would learn from my mom.

[p.s. I feel the need to point out that I don't edit blogs. So please don't judge my lack of flowy composition.]